Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Patient but Pissed -- does that mean they cancel each other out?

You often hear people say - I ate a chocolate bar today, but I also exercised, so they cancel each other out ... or I got to work late today, but I ended up staying late too, so that cancels each other out ... What does that mean? When we do things that cancel each other out, where does that leave us? We're not moving forward - we're adding 1 and subtracting 1 ... ending up with a big, fat ZERO. Sometimes I wonder why I try and achieve balance when I really end up feeling completely unbalanced. Sometimes I feel like things become so mechanical that they lose meaning ... yet without that steady mechanical motion, I feel like I can’t move forward. It’s like trying to feel relaxed, but in order to relax I need to fix a strict schedule for me to adhere to … how relaxing can that be?So many things make me pause and think during the day … things I saw, things I read, things I thought about, things I said …Things that people said to me, things that people did …Do I take on too much? Do I try and control things that are really out of my hands?Have I become so focused on trying to make other people happy that I have forgotten what it is that makes me happy? Have I overcommitted myself to the point where I can’t keep any of my commitments?Why does it feel like I’m stuck in the middle of that big, fat ZERO?If I’m trying my best to be patient, but feeling really pissed inside, do the feelings cancel each other out?
[Reposted from one of my previous blogs]

1 comment:

Jade said...

You can be patient AND pissed. Don't worry so much about the two sides of the equation. Just follow your heart :)