Thursday, August 12, 2010

Signs of Stress

Okay. It’s started. Last night, my anxiety about my research and writing got so bad that I couldn’t get to sleep. I stayed up late and worked until I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer. I don’t think I slept … it was more like I passed out from exhaustion and was jolted awake, not because I was all refreshed and ready to go, but because I started to see myself at my desk in my dreams … the sharp anxiety pain in my abdomen got me up and straight to my desk with just about 4 hours of sleep.

Anxiety and stomach cramps are the first sign of my pre-deadline stress.

The second sign, I whine. The first white that comes out of my mouth is, “I can’t do it. I’m going to fail.” This is followed by, “What have I gotten myself into? I’m not smart enough.” Then this is followed by random groans and moans … never a good sign when this happens.

The third sign, and this is when it gets really worrying, is when I start reciting the words of The Bangles’ song “If she knew what she wants.” Note that I said reciting and not singing. I (softly) recite the first two parts of the song in quadruple time! I have absolutely no idea why I do this, why this song, or how/when this happened. All I know is that when I start doing this, it’s a bad sign and all those in the nearby vicinity better make a run for it!

3 comments:

Lola said...

The Bangles song thing is FREAKING me OUT! And your blogs are STRESSING me OUT! You know you can do this because you have never missed a deadline and your work has always been great :))) Repeat that instead of "if she knew what she wants"!!! ;D

LMP said...

I thought all that yoga and stuff was helping you relax. No wonder you're at the gym so often, though I'm sure better use of that time would be to be at home studying.
Relax.
You'll get it done.
You always do.
And pick a new song. Something really strange about you muttering the lyrics of a Bangles song when you're stressed.

Jade said...

LOL